Life Hack…

I’ve been watching Brooklyn 99 for a couple of years now. I love it. Andy Samberg is hilarious. He is cute, and has taught me so much about life. Like things I never knew about sandwiches, and humility, but most importantly he taught me about life-hacks.

Life hacks are my new thing. Well, I always knew about them, but I didn’t know what to call them!

Let me explain. Life hacks are simple, every day opportunities to maybe achieve something for free, or at a reduced price, those ummmm victimless work-arounds that ummmm work out well for you. Errr, just explaining it now it sounds dodgy. Look, they are supposed to make life easier. Look, the ever-helpful Wikipedia explains Life Hacks as thing that make life more efficient, slash easier (Wikipedia definition of Life hack ) through tricks or novelties, shortcut or skill. (The phrase was coined by IT nerds, so that probably explains everything...

It’s probably easier if you just read on.

Life hack #1: Ikea parking

I went to ikea last week, to return something. I love returning things. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s a decluttering thing. Like recluttering, followed closely by decluttering. Stop buying things!!!!

Anyway, I’m the Queen of returns. Probably keeping your receipt is life hack number one. I once returned a dress in the US that I had worn the night before, by refitting the tags, and I had the receipt. And that is after another party-goer had spilled wine on it. Red wine. .. I washed it, obviously. And got my money back. That’s probably not a great, ethical, example.

Anyway. I diligently made my return of an unopened, unused, airing rack, and ran down to Coles to get a few things. Heading back to the carpark I realised I hadn’t spent enough to get free parking! Doh! I scanned the parking card, and the receipt and the screen said I had to pay $1. One whole dollar! Nooooooo. I cancelled the transaction and thought about going to the shops to buy more because  I didn’t have any change (I'm a cash free society). And then…. I remembered my receipt from Ikea. The $200 one that I had returned a $39 item from. Put the card back. Scanned the week old Ikea receipt and won the Ikea Richmond car-park jackpot and life-hacked my way out of a $1 parking ticket. The machine recognised the old receipt and let me out for free.

Woot woot!

Life hack #2: Airport parking

I know, I drive too much; I should get public transport more. But I was much belatedly booking a park at the airport. Seriously, I had to lie and say I wouldn’t be there for 2 hours when I was actually arriving in about 1hour and 15 minutes. Beyond that, I realised that I needed to park as close as possible, but the lateness of my booking meant I would probably be offered the opportunity to park as far away from the airport as possible. The other issue about late bookings is the premium price they put on your booking. Anyway, in a stroke of genius I clicked on the parking that is furthest from the airport, the one you need to take a bus to get to the terminal. The one that freaks me out because I am constantly late and can barely rely on myself to get to the plane, I can’t rely on finding a park, and catching a bus, even if they go every 10 minutes, to make my flight. I wouldn’t make it. But anyway, too many anyways. I know. I click on the bus to airport parking option, coz its about $30 less than the other parking. And guess what? It gives you the cost of that type of parking plus the opportunity to upgrade to terminal parking for $15. This may seem like nothing to you, but the whole cost of it was less than it would have been had I selected it outright. What’s that about? Who cares? Love a good life hack. And I made my flight.

I asked my nieces and nephews what their best idea was for a life hack. After I explained to them using Andy Samberg’s Character Jake from Brooklyn 99s example – (Drop your sandwich on the floor to get it for free) – they came up with this one: Buy something you really want for yourself, knowin’ that the person you bought it for wont fit it, or can't eat it. In particular, they said they would buy me chocolates. I’m allergic to chocolate. As mentioned in my Blog (Mr Champagne and chocolates ). Needless to say - I am a proud Aunty!

The un-life-hack:

I got a bunch of these:

Don’t buy clothes in a size to small for your thinking that they will inspire you to lose weight. They won’t. In my humble opinion.

I think this is going to be a recurring theme.

I love life hacks.